Wednesday, August 8, 2007

The Catch 22 of Cable Connection

Round and Round in the Circle Game

It's hard to coordinate the building of a house from 1300 miles away. I've said it before, and I'll likely say it again, but rarely have I been so thwarted until I tried to schedule an appointment for cable installation.

Comcast has a toll free number, as every major corporation does. Even the robots know how to route your call. Eventually. People need answers from people, not the phone-droids. I did not know then, that if you want to buy cable long distance you have to learn

Pizza is the answer


If you want to schedule cable installation you are supposed to put in the telephone number of your residence. My residence-to-be does not have a telephone number. In fact, Comcast itself would be the ones to give me my telephone number due to a bundling offer. My residence-to-be does not yet have flooring. Wiring is going on.

Like a fool, I tried to get customer service the old fashioned way. By punching the "O" key furiously. By responding to the robot's every question with "customer rep" "help" "human being". After awhile the robot will say, "I'm not quite understanding, so I'm transferring you to some one who can help you. Yay, say I. I said "Yay" way too soon.

A patient woman named Marge introduces herself and asks how she can help me. The trouble is she is in Little Rock, near where I live. I am calling from an Arkansas number. She cannot transfer me to someone in New England. The numbers she gives me are fax lines, or ring endlessly, and are not toll free. I look for Comcast numbers for Massachusetts on Google and find offices all over the state, but their purpose remains a mystery due to voice mail or no answer.

Since one must use the cable company the town contracts with, and I wanted to try cable instead of DSL, I was in the eye of the storm with no way out.

Back to the toll free number which asserts they are ready to assist 24/7. I get Marge again. In Little Rock. Hours and hours have passed. I'm dizzy. I'm cranky. I'm glum.

But if any of you get caught in this kind of whirlwind, given we are a mobile society, I have the answer to this ONE problem.

When I was mysteriously connected to Jason in NH who could help me, he told me the secret.

Pizza. Why it's the answer.

What you should do is find the number of a local pizza place in the town to which you are moving. When you are asked to punch in the home phone number you do not have, give them the number of the Vito and Tony's House of Pizza Trattoria Restaurante or some such in the area you will inhabit. You will be routed to the area rep and all will move smoothly from there.

That's yet another reason why pizza is one of the major food groups.


1 comment:

bevjackson said...

LOL LOL LOL....I love this post!!